-A window ajar is a prelude in building to the joy of being limitless! That uneasiness of being familiar somehow, sometime, somewhere.......

Thursday, December 23, 2004

The story of The Choice.

This write-up is a byproduct of a discussion with a friend.Any credit, if at all worthy should be reserved for her for digging this from withinme.

Crescendo-The Birth of the Choice.

Choice. One word. Two different directions. Small challenge for conscience. Between pain and less pain. First you dismiss it as trivia. You presume you can work around it. There is no respite for such false conjectures. You think you can succeed in escaping into fiction.But it only takes time to separate fact from forged.The escape seems almost effortless, until it slowly dawns upon you. It did not chase you instead you have chased yourself into it. What seemed a beautiful reality has been ruthlessly shattered by an ugly unreal. You want to hold onto something, but there are no planks in the mind. A culprit has to be desperately assembled now, painted with excuses and draped by emotions. A neurotic search is on for what was always yours but you never owned; your mind.Since it is silent you assume everything is fine, but you do not know silence does speak.Pleading for forgiveness you hear a faint voice, you wish it was someone’s; sadly it is your own. The growing voice tells you that the world has betrayed the morality of truth and laughed at your misery. Amidst this terrible pain of chaos you start feeling it but you are not sure what within you feels it. The feeling unfolds from the void of within building slowly inch by inch into an unbearable force, an impulse, a choice.

Decrescendo-The Death of the Choice.

An overwhelming initiation takes over your entire being directing all conflicts into a state of logic which looks absurd then. Yet it makes complete sense because you badly wanted this and this can arise from absolute chaos not order. Now the ego can be trusted to build on this denomination and beat a slow retreat from self. Well secured you deduce that the universe is a silly joke that nobody wants to laugh at. There is no other truth higher than this you scream at the top of your lungs. Laughter abounds now, not at the universe but at you, you have become the joke. You search around to find a face that laughed but the universe is faceless. You recede to check your premises, but all appears quiet on your front. To catch a glimpse of any heaven you must kiss death first. Your weakened conscious is a danger to itself and to others. Your memory is dementing but your choice remembers the universe. Some of it remembers you, some of it doesn’t. Consequence is the final installment of that choice. You will die now with your choices. The choice did not fail you. It has fulfilled its purpose. You now comprehend it. Another simple game. New universe. Counterchoice. Choice.

If gone unnoticed, the first para comprises sentences carrying one extra word than the preceding ones while the second para is a tone down completing the harmony of the paradox.

25 comments:

. : A : . said...

Amazing!

And no, it did not go unnoticed. Into the 7th sentence, it struck me and I went back and started counting the words! By the time I reached the second para, I knew exactly what to expect.

;-)

Very well done. Nice, new style.

:..M..: said...

This was really good. It got me all jittery even!
And yes, I did notice. I have to say, this is one of the most exciting piece of work I've ever read.

Anonymous said...

beautiful description
been thro' exactly the same way described...except for some, which were waaay over my head
im awed by your lucidity

Havokinthemind said...

"A culprit has to be desperately assembled now, painted with excuses and draped by emotions" the most brilliant description of rationalization, i've ever seen...

the whole piece is a wonderful combination of form and content....wow

Anonymous said...

Quite interesting! And strongly echoing the laybrinths of Jorge Loius Borges.

~Sashi

Ubermensch said...

: A :
thank u.
i knew i could 'count' on you.:))


:..M..:
hmmm, thanks for the appreciation.

Anon
thanks ,exactly, we all go through that...tho in a nano second everything gets over...this was an attempt to push words into that moment when conscious is challenged.

Havokinthemind
thanks a lot for your kind words. really pleased you could identify the rationalisation.

sashi,
totally honoured to have you here.this comment means means a lot to me.hmmm parallels with borges....that too depths,hmmm the master is supreme , i cant even dream to go there..guess may be because ive used extensive second person narration. amore third person wud have become kafkeseque...
interesting observation though, thanks again for dropping by.

T.O. said...

What an awesome, poetic and insightful post. Bravo! I look forward to more.

mp_cnb said...

Interesting post, very well written. i'll need to re-read it couple of times to get it in its entirety

. : A : . said...

:-)

I am working on something similar (or at least I think so). Will try and put it up soon.

Sudarshan said...

Stupendous! A master piece! I am cursing the creator. I always prayed for a better ability. He didn’t even consider bestowing a fraction I deserved. Better sense prevailed, cursed him, cursed her, stopped praying, started blogging. Came across a character, you, a creator of sorts, talented, a “spin” doctor. Nice post, innovative, kudos to you….but still don’t agree with your remarks on Kumble ;)!
Am I sounding a bit “Odd”..just a small effort to show my appreciation..great work dude.

Anonymous said...

amazzzzzziiiing,
oh i got it in the third line. i still stand by my evaluation of you...an unfocussed genius :))
''A neurotic search is on for what was always yours but you never owned; your mind''.
isnt that language+metaphysics+subsconscious in a sentence...awesome.im rereread it and its still growing on me.lucid man damn it u dont move into fiction,im done then:)))
btw ive moved into NY, stay in touch
k

d.K.m said...

truly interesting ... continue the innovations that just stand to amaze... kudos! dude

sanjana said...

whoa!
whew!
wow!

Ubermensch said...

oh oh hold it folks....seems all the festivity has taken its toll on the judgement

T.O.,

thanks a lot for appreciation!

mp_cnb ,

thank u for the feedback , appreciate it!

:A:,:)) checked :- as i said ur more faithful to the emotions:)thanks.


Sudarshan
You have been very kind with your words there. im just trying to put my vagaries into some form. These experiments are a tribute to my belief that language is yet to justify the amaze of human life. Really appreciate your nice input except your misunderstanding :) of some medium pacer.:)


Dear k,
First thanks for dropping by and the comment,
Please quit hurling such abuse:) I remember your evaluation long back; but I hope u also remember my response to that, please do not look for consistency within me:)) if it comes to that I may leave it where the Jesus left the Jews:)

The sentence u have pointed is a one of my favourite ; doesn’t it say ''you have lost your mind so delicately''.


kishore;
thanks for the visit and the encouragement.

Sanjana
Thanks, isn’t that an interesting alliteration:)?

Sudarshan said...

Dude, we can talk about the medium pacer later..but guess you failed to notice that my comment had sentences with 1,3,5,7...words :(...dont tell me you didnt mention it delibrately :)...and btw I am not the cousin

Ubermensch said...

Damn! should have got the ''odd''.thank you, im blaming the vodka.

d.K.m said...

well! well! nicely done Sudarshan ... haha :)

boyracer said...

what r u doing in here?
go write your book. i'll be waiting at the bookstore to purchase it.
wonderful...simply wonderful...

Sudarshan said...

Was it as good as the medium pacer’s googly ;)?
Kishori, thanks.

pits said...

Great style. You almost have a new niche of blogging here. I think you should focus on publishing in black and white.

Ubermensch said...

hardcorearena,
you are very magnanimous with your appreciation,thanks.
my soul is yet accumulate higher truths to put it in a book...more journeys await.......
thank you and like your handle:)

pits,
thanks...et u brunus?:)you know how to pronounce that don u?

Sudarshan my friend,
now that im in my senses,lemme clarify...the umpire says the appeal was too vociferous and with the pace the keeper kishore missed it and its hit the fence...:)
master piece is a single word.... a no-ball in cricket parlance!!


At 9:06 AM, pits said...
Great style. You almost have a new niche of blogging here. I think you should focus on publishing in black and white.

Sudarshan said...

Pity, the umpire noticed the mistake during the "drinks" break. The decision cannot be revoked ;)!

MomentsOfTruth said...

How awesome !
Superb stuff dished out.. Kudos !

. : A : . said...

Yes you are right, the two posts are indeed interconnected.

http://english-august.blogspot.com/2005/09/close.html

Ubermensch said...

momentsoftruth
cheers:)
:a:
of course!

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