-A window ajar is a prelude in building to the joy of being limitless! That uneasiness of being familiar somehow, sometime, somewhere.......

Sunday, March 13, 2005

Biography of twelve

Growing consciousness is a danger and a disease........
~Frederich Nietzsche.

Warm and silent, the air weighed pregnant with the scent of old wine, burnt tobacco and the growing night.Embalmed in the ambience of such a night he sat by the fire, reading his testament that rested weightless on the lap.By now, he had read it such many times that his eyes ached in weariness.Having carefully studied the final words again , he laid back, slowly closing his eyes and in the darkness all he felt was the moist beads of sweat formed on his forehead.For some strange reason, a fleeting all-knowing smile crossed his face before he smoothly embraced the oblivion of sleep.
It wasnt too long before he was woken up by the clock striking a lengthy twelve. As he gathered to stand up his bowels churned restlessly in anticipation of the great unknown creating eddies in his ears.His throat filled with certain tasteless waters.Now upright and firm he gazed absently around, while his hand found the heavy steel underneath his coat and pressed it obediently against his temple.'Its time for farewell' he muttered aloud.
In the next instant his form lay lifeless amidst spurting pool of blood and fresh smoke.

A new day had otherwise started on its own terms. Dark as always.
It was just his clock that was ahead of time.

-------

The fault, dear Brutus is not in our stars,
But in ourselves that we are underlings..
~William shakespeare /Julius Caesar/

She woke up with an almost finishing dream and a faint scent of night's vodka in her breath.A rusty consciousness and the early summer light piercing past the curtains made it hard to focus on the clock.Soon the blur settled into a digital image of twenty to eight.Still dazed, she lit up a cigarette, the first of the day and sat smoking while pondering over the long day ahead .When the cigarette died an eventual death, she dawdled herself effortfully towards the mirror-the old pimple on her left cheek was swollen and tender. As she stood, thinking of the probable remedies, a vague overwhelming impulse with the belching waters in the mouth seized her.She heard a consistent gurgle from the belly.Perceptive of the impending, she hastened to the wash- to find what could only be her night's dinner splashed about. It was bitter and strong.Although relieved, it was worrying that it was the third time she was sick in two days.Suddenly a thought seized her.

In a frenzy, she took out the white-pack from the top shelf and read the small print carefully.Over and over and many a times aloud.Within moments, she opened it and placed two drops of urine and waited impatiently through a seeming eternity.
Soon a tiny streak of irregular blue formed against a white backdground.'Damn' she swore aloud with the second cigarette flaring in hand.

In the background the electronic timbre of the eight o clock alarm repeated endlessly in a monotonous song.
Outside the city bustled in welcome of another rush hour.

Epilogue/Theme: The sentences are deliberately fragmented at the expense of rhythm and flow.The purpose is to accomodate the theme of twelve cranial nerves.
Each sentence, at large, is meant to represent the function of a cranial nerve.Sign-off sentences are used to re-impress the backdrop of birth and death.

Could have done lot better , but what would you expect on a long motorway?

20 comments:

T.O. said...

Better? That was awesome. You continue to impress and amaze me, uber.

inspiredbylife said...

hum... where are you these days? missing your presence man... BTW, that was intersting! :)

. : A : . said...

Very well written.

I liked the one representing birth more, though. It hung on.

The one representing death was good on its own (as a seperate piece) but when put together with the second part it could work a bit harder is what I felt.

Free Spirit said...

I like your dramatic unfoldings of life and death.

SeaSwallowMe said...

they go down smooth, yoss-man ... very very smooth :))

i think my favorites were the bookends, so to speak ... loved the way the second one ended .. and the lines which opened the first :-P

(and no, not because i'm the type that loves happy endings - most definitely am not !!)

P.S. LOL @ those amusing mnemonics to remember the name & function of those cranial nerves. i'm trying to remember what we used for the 10th grade bio exams - but i'm drawing a blank :)

jenn see said...

sensory impulses--what imagistic writing is all about.

T said...

I certainly couldn't have done any better...not near as good as this. Very interesting...I never expected the bits about the bowel-churning...having those in there was so very honest. No one ever puts in that kind of stuff and has it be..."palatable"...so to speak. Good job, my dear.

buckwaasur said...

Could have done lot better , but what would you expect on a long motorway

yeah dude...if u wanna do better, u should stop trying to write on long motorways...try a notebook instead

kidding aside, this was a really cool piece...liked it a lot. :-)

Silent Melody said...

Hi Uber; interesting to say the least;

asuph said...

yoss!

the first time I ran through it, I was going "what the **** is this?". then I said, this is yoss, so gotta read it at a slow pace, and voila! that did the trick :). man at this rate, I don't think I'll understand your 5th next piece.

-asuph.

India Whining said...

Hi There Yoss..

Enjoyed this piece immensely.. Some mediocrity this :)

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El enigma said...

hey yosso.....a beautiful piece there....liked the second one far better than the first.....and *loved* the way u started off both of 'em.....there was a deep sense of melancholy shouting out loud from them both......not sure if that was intended or a mere side effect...

enig!

Ubermensch said...

T O,
thank you, you are being sweet.

IBL,
Right here, nobody is indispensible, well may be ssm is!:)

:A:,
I expected teh second to be popular,ive filtered the conscious off in the first.As i mentioned, i still feel lot could be improved there.
thanks

belle,
thank you, its an honour, coming from the queen of all emotional truths:)

sea,
thank you,hmmm regarding the mnemonics...lets just stay you havent heard the ''real ones'' at all:)

jen,
thank you for the visit and comments

fuego,
thank you...really appreciate it.

buck, melody,whining,
thanks indeed.

asuph,
you cant understand ooo sounds like warning there:)

enigma,
melancholy was intended,glad it came across,i had harder time thinking for teh first, second was okay.i wanted the first to be set in retro era while first would more modern.
thank you

Sudarshan said...

Awesome man..and to think you werent happy with the result!

. : A : . said...

Yes, you have filtered the conscious off in the first now that I look at it again.

d.K.m said...

cool!! :))

Ubermensch said...

sudharshan, kishore, :a:
thanks

Nithya Swaminathan said...

Wow!
Had to read and re-read the piece to understand it...

After going thru that crash course on cranial nerves and when i read the piece again, it seemed much better... nothing short of mind blowing! but whats new in that anyway..:)

Ubermensch said...

Nithya,
thank u :)

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